#544: Lyme’s Disease Saga

This is my daughter Becky:
She’s a gardener with Garden Design Company,
here showing off a tradescantia.
This is her back a week ago:
Classic Lyme’s bull’s-eye.
Want to see it closer?
That’s it, we’ve had Lyme’s in our household
a dozen times, easily.
We live next to the State Forest and spend
a lot of time wandering around on the moors.
What can I say? Between the deer and
the white-footed mice, there’s a lot of ticks around here.
Our two cats bring them in on their fur.
So, of course we knew exactly what to do.
Take amoxicillin for 21 days.
But how to get a prescription?
That’s the saga part.
1. Call Dr. Koehm, who took over Dr. Hinson’s practice,
answering machine. Left message.
2.Call hospital, get hotline number.
3. Call hotline, explain about Lyme’s bulls-eye,
‘can’t fit you in, go to Emergency Room’
4. Call Dr. Pearl’s office, answering machine, left message.
5. Call both Dr. Pearl’s Nurse Practitioners, left messages.
6. Call Dr. Lepore, left message.
7. Call Dr. Lepore’s Nurse Practitioner, left message.
8. Call Dr. Koehm again, another message.
9. Call Dr. Butterworth, got an actual human.
Message-same as all the others:
I have a Lyme’s bulls-eye, ALL I NEED
is somebody to look at it and prescribe some antibiotics.
And she said, ‘Let me call you back.’
Nine calls, still in the void of the abyss of bureaucracy.
10. Dr. Butterworth’s office calls back.
‘I’ve had a cancellation, I can fit you in in half an hour,
if you hadn’t told me exactly what it was, we wouldn’t have been
able to fit you in.’
Leave work, go directly to Dr. Butterworth’s, see nurse
Oh, yeah, that’s a Lyme’s bulls-eye,
we’ll have Dr. Butterworth look at it…
he looks, confirms diagnosis and 
Writes A Prescription.
Next time, I grow my own penicillin.

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